Live Well

Why Anger is More Torrent Than Fire and How to Deal With It

This blog is based on Bhagavad Gita Chapter 2 verse 62, Chapter 2 verse 63, Chapter 5 verse 26, Chapter 16 verse 1 – 3, and Chapter 16 verse 21.

Anger, lust, and greed together has created the mess around us. There are more than 4.4 crore pending cases in the court. Wealth inequality is at an all-time high. The incidences of social injustice, crime, hate, corruption, poverty, etc. are prevailing everywhere.

It seems like life is a mess, and no one knows how to take control of it. In this article, I have tried to look into the root cause through the teachings of Bhagavad Gita.

Our body composes of six sensory organs:

Eye to see the material objects.
Ear to hear the sound.
Nose to smell the odor.
Tongue to taste.
Body to feel the touch.
Mind to ponder on mental objects.

They are always in the receptive mode — without anyone directing them to do their respective job, they continuously do their assigned duty.

All of these sensory organs keep sending their observations as well as desires to the mind which causes our mind to dwell on material objects. Eyes dwell for seeing beautiful and pleasing things and people around, ear dwells to hear the pleasing sound, the nose wants to smell fragrances, tongue craves for tasty foods, the body wants caring touches and surrounded by the demands of the body organs it is busy thinking about the way to fulfill the desire of all organs.

Shri Krishna explains the cause and effects of our dwelling on the material object succinctly in the Bhagavad Gita Chapter 2 verse 62 and verse 63.

“The person who dwells on the material objects, there arises attachment for them.
Attachment grows hankering.
Hankering springs anger.
From anger arises the delusion.
Delusion causes the bewilderment of memory.
When memory catches the bewilderment intelligence is lost.
When intelligence is lost one further falls down to the greedy material desire.
Chained in the web of material desire the life is lost, the purpose of life is lost and instead of living a happy, healthy, peaceful and joyous life; you end up living sad, mad, stressed and confused.

I want to tell you the story I heard during my childhood.

A man was on tour to see the serene and pilgrimage across the country. The man felt tired and started looking around for a place where he can take rest. He spotted a large tree surrounded by a celestial atmosphere. He decided to rest beneath the tree.

After a while, he felt hungry. He thought what if he is served with delicious food right now. Within a moment delicious full-course meal was present in front of him. He ate the meal.
After eating the meal, he felt the need to sleep well. He murmured “What if there is an arrangement for bed is made for him to sleep.”

A cushioned bed appeared at an instant. He slept on the bed.

After a while, his sleep was disturbed due to cold weather and he felt for a quilt which was also presented to him immediately.

Presented with all the things he wished immediately, he started doubting about it. He thought there may be some demon that would be presenting it all in front of him having the motive to kill him. He got plagued by doubts, fear and suspicion.

He wished “What if demon comes and kills him?” Immediately a demon came and he got killed.

This is what happens to the people. You are born for a purpose, but you get caught in the delusion losing your pearl for a penny.

Habits of People Who doesn’t catch anger and deluded

Let me tell you that you cannot get rid of your anger. However, you can certainly manage it and control it. Here are a few tips for you:

Know your ultimate life goal
Stop living a purposeless life. Sooner than later, realize what life wants from you; You would be much better if you live a life true to yourself.
Always live a balanced life — A balanced life is one where your every day is a mix of doing things for the head (knowledge acquisition), the heart (compassionate to one and all), and the hunger (eating healthy foods).
Shri Krishna says “It is better to live your own destiny imperfectly than to live an imitation of somebody else’s life with perfection.”
Your life is made of your own destiny, habits, interests, thoughts, perspectives and life situations. Instead of creating stress and dissatisfaction looking outwardly, it is better to accept wherever you are and whatever you have got.

Relax your body and calm mind with yoga and meditation

Deep breathing and relaxing techniques as prescribed in yoga and meditation, can help calm down angry feelings. Bhagavad Gita has a chapter to teach you about the meditation techniques as well as there are several resources like videos, audio, articles and discourses to teach meditation and yoga to you. Once you learn the techniques and practice it regularly, you can call upon them in any situation. Some simple steps you can try:

Breathe deeply, from your diaphragm; breathing from your chest won’t relax you.
Focus your attention on your forehead above the nostril and place between the eyebrows.
Chant OM or just repeat the phrase like “relax”, “take it easy”. Keep it repeating while breathing deeply.

Some yoga exercises can relax your muscles and make you feel much calmer. Regular practice of these techniques will keep your mind calm to improve your anger management capabilities.

Identify triggers that makes you angry

If you are getting angry way too frequently due to quarrels, bad relationships, bad work-life imbalances, etc. you need to understand the exact triggers of your anger. Once you know the trigger, you need to take actions that will get you out of the rut.

Step away or postpone the things

When you face an uneven situation, it instantly fuels your anger. If you know that some conversation is going to explode your anger, it is better to pre-plan your strategies to tackle it. If you are not getting the right strategy, it is better to postpone it or stay away from it for a while.

Sometimes it helps to set a specific time and place when you can discuss the issue again. Tell people that the issue will indeed be discussed—just at a later time.
By now, you know that anger is the root cause of most evils. If you can realize, relax and practice anger control techniques, you can use your learning to benefit in handling life conditions better.

In the Bhagavad Gita Chapter 2 verse 56 Shri Krishna says:

“That monk is called a man of steady wisdom whose mind is unperturbed by sorrow, he is free from longing for delights, and has gone beyond attachment, fear, and anger.”

BE THAT MONK.

References:
दुःखेष्वनुद्विग्नमनाः सुखेषु विगतस्पृहः।
वीतरागभयक्रोधः स्थितधीर्मुनिरुच्यते।।2.56।।

ध्यायतो विषयान्पुंसः सङ्गस्तेषूपजायते।
सङ्गात् संजायते कामः कामात्क्रोधोऽभिजायते।।2.62।
क्रोधाद्भवति संमोहः संमोहात्स्मृतिविभ्रमः।
स्मृतिभ्रंशाद् बुद्धिनाशो बुद्धिनाशात्प्रणश्यति।।2.63।।

2.62-2.63 In the case of a person who dwells on objects, there arises attachment for them. From attachment grows hankering, from hankering springs anger.

While contemplating the objects of the senses, a person develops attachment for them, and from such attachment, lust develops, and from lust, anger arises.

From anger, delusion arises, and from delusion bewilderment of memory. When memory is bewildered, intelligence is lost, and when intelligence is lost, one falls down again into the material pool.

5.26
कामक्रोधवियुक्तानां यतीनां यतचेतसाम्।
अभितो ब्रह्मनिर्वाणं वर्तते विदितात्मनाम्।।5.26।।

Those who are free from anger and all material desires, who are self-realized, self-disciplined and constantly endeavoring for perfection, are assured of liberation in the Supreme in the very near future.

  1. 1 -3
    अभयं सत्त्वसंशुद्धिर्ज्ञानयोगव्यवस्थिति: |
    दानं दमश्च यज्ञश्च स्वाध्यायस्तप आर्जवम् || 1||
    अहिंसा सत्यमक्रोधस्त्याग: शान्तिरपैशुनम् |
    दया भूतेष्वलोलुप्त्वं मार्दवं ह्रीरचापलम् || 2||
    तेज: क्षमा धृति: शौचमद्रोहोनातिमानिता |
    भवन्ति सम्पदं दैवीमभिजातस्य भारत || 3||

The Blessed Lord said: Fearlessness, purification of one’s existence, cultivation of spiritual knowledge, charity, self-control, the performance of sacrifice, the study of the Vedas, austerity and simplicity; nonviolence, truthfulness, freedom from anger; renunciation, tranquility, aversion to faultfinding, compassion and freedom from covetousness; gentleness, modesty and steady determination; vigor, forgiveness, fortitude, cleanliness, freedom from envy and the passion for honor-these transcendental qualities, O son of Bharata, belong to godly men endowed with divine nature.

16.21
त्रिविधं नरकस्येदं द्वारं नाशनमात्मन: |
काम: क्रोधस्तथा लोभस्तस्मादेतत्त्रयं त्यजेत् || 21||

There are three gates leading to this hell-lust, anger, and greed. Every sane man should give these up, for they lead to the degradation of the soul.

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Three Ways to Experience God Based on What You Prefer the Most

Do you think you don’t know how to pray? Here are three ways you can pray to God.

The First is your body; your body is not yours but of God.

Live in the best spiritual and physical condition, eating healthy foods, getting enough sleep to wake up every morning to serve God, and emotional balance to tune up your body to serve God.

A healthy body is the adobe of a healthy soul. When you carry a healthy soul, you attract courage, gallantry, stability, stubbornness, peace, tranquility, high morals, and spirituality.

The Second is your heart; regular prayer with chants and mantras to keep remembering the almighty God.

Whether your motive is to fulfill material desire, liberation, power, holistic evolution, eradication of sufferings, or spiritual progress — you will be gifted with a beautiful heart that touches others.

Chant joyfully calling his name, feeling his presence in everything and every being.
Sing his song praising his kindness and his services, providing us with the essentials of living.
Look at his idol, praising him and thanking him and blessing him to instill goodness, steadfastness, and love forever.

The Third is your soul; continuous meditation, study, and reflection of God’s supreme existence.

If you are oriented more towards meditation than money, if love is more important than the logic to you, if you think the soul is more important than mind and body, power over yourself is more important than power over others — then meditate.

You will not only be able to get rid of anxiety, depression, fear and mental imbalances, but practicing meditation, you will attain self-realization or illumination.

In my view ShriKrishna has explained the most accurate way to meditate in Bhagavad Gita which I have written here How to meditate according to Bhagavad Gita

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How to focus on the important thing

When asked: “How have you been?”
Your usual response would be, “Ahhh… I have been so much busy these days.”
“What is it that keeps you so much busy?”
?
?
?
“Have you got what you always wanted from life?”
“It isn’t going anywhere.”
“Are you happy?”
“Well… It’s quite a difficult thing to be happy these days.”
If you are busy, but you don’t have clear answers, you are doing things without having clarity about your goals, prioritizing what is important to you, and committing your time to do the important stuff.
Wake up now.
You’ve already wasted enough doing the shallow work. It’s time to visually, emotionally, financially and functionally commit to your goals. And I bet that you will feel happy that you did those things vital to you at the end of the day.

How to focus on the important thing Read More »

How to meditate according to Bhagavad Gita

Meditation helps you elevate yourself by yourself. With meditation practices properly, you can have control over the mind. Having a controlled mind, you live tranquil in heat and cold, in pleasure and pain, honor and dishonor.

Meditation enhances your knowledge, a better understanding of the self, poise, and control over the senses. You also become impartial towards your companions, friends, enemies, arbitrators, haters, relatives, friends, saints, and sinners.

The meditation should be performed sitting on a firm surface, neither too high nor too low, covered with grass mat or cloth mat and the place must be clean.

Sitting firmly, you should focus your mind on a single object like sensation in your nostril. Whenever your mind starts wandering, please bring it back to the object you are focusing on.

Hold your waist, spine, chest, neck, and head firmly erect, motionless, and steady. Fix the eyes and the mind steady on the point between the eyebrows, and don’t move your eyes.

To achieve the maximum result from the meditation, one should not overeat or sleep too much.

After a while, practicing meditation regularly, you will attain tranquillity of mind. Your mind will be fully absorbed in the self. Your journey to supreme bliss would begin when your mind is tranquil, your desires are under control, and you feel free from sin.

How to meditate according to Bhagavad Gita Read More »

What do you want from life vs. what life wants from you?

Do you struggle to find the answer to:
“What do I want from life?”
“What should I do to feel the victim of circumstances?”
If you feel demotivated, unsure, aimless, can’t find any work that makes you lose yourself, you’re not alone — most people are in the same boat.

The Hindu value system suggested us an appropriate system to better plan and organise our life based on the life stages. Childhood for study, character-building and living with full celibacy. Adulthood for earning livelihood to earn and maintain family well-being. The sunset years to manage, monitor and mentor children imparting them teaching and guidance to become to acquire knowledge and skills.

Nowadays, people prefer to live in a nuclear family to enjoy the freedom and joint family obligations. “Family first.” is replaced with “Me first.” A while ago, one of my professional acquaintance said, “After years of struggle wh your material desire gets fulfilled, you look back only to discover that you have lost a precious life and time for the fulfillment of your meaningless cravings. You have messed up family values, alienated social fabric, and your self-centered nature starts making you feel more like a curse.”

Knowing why is an essential first step in figuring out how to achieve the goals that excite you and create a life you enjoy living instead of surviving every day. “Why” is not about what you want for yourself but, its purpose is to know the ultimate goals that will wake you every morning. I ask my audiences to invoke their imagination during my workshops by asking, “If you have to write your autobiography today, what is your story?” This thinking alone will get you the motivation needed to rethinking the possibilities to move to a more purpose-driven life.

Begin by writing a few things that you want to make it happen and then actually do it. You will observe that when a clear purpose powers you, there is little you cannot do.

Question I want to leave you with today — What is the thing that helped you to get the best out of you? What helped you discover your true purpose?

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This alone shall solve all your problems

A hungry, tired, and empty-handed disciple turns to a monk for help. After carefully listening to the pain of his disciple the monk hands him over a shining object. “This alone shall solve all of your problems provided you reach out to the right person.”

The disciple accepted the object and left the place. After a while, he spotted a farmer and offered the precious stone to him, “I am hungry, tired and empty-handed. It would be kind if you’d buy this shining object from me.”

The farmer looked at the shining object, “It is none of my use but since you are hungry, I can take the grains equal to the weight of the object.”

The disciple instantly remembered the words of the monk and left the place without accepting the offer.

After some travel, he met with a grocery merchant. He approached him, “I am hungry, tired and empty-handed. Would you be able to buy this shining object and in exchange give me money.” The merchant looked at the shining object and he thought that it can help him measure the goods faster. “I can give you sugar equivalent to the weight of the shining object.” The disciple didn’t find the offer exciting and decided to move ahead.

He continued his journey further. He saw a jewelry merchant selling many similar shining objects in his shop. He went near the shopkeeper, “I am hungry, tired and empty-handed. Would you be able to buy this shining object and in exchange give me cash?”

The shopkeeper examined the shining object. He thought that he can use it to make more jewelry and earn more money. He said, “I will give you Rs. 10,000/- in exchange for the precious stone.”
The disciple wasn’t satisfied with the offer. He continued his search for another buyer. After a while, he entered a large diamond shop. He approached the owner, “I am hungry, tired and empty-handed. Would you be able to buy this shining object and in exchange give me money.” The diamond merchant was amused holding in his hand the most expensive and rare diamond.

He made an offer, “Gentleman, you are so lucky to own this precious stone. I don’ have enough money to buy it, but I am happy to offer you a partnership. We will make high-quality diamond jewelry from it and sell it in the market. We will invest the earnings to expand our business to become rich and famous.” The disciple was happy to accept the partnership offer. They started working together and over a period of time, they both became rich and famous.

Whether you are in the job or business, you need to connect and network with the right kind of people who discovers your true value. Then only you can leverage your real potential and achieve your goals.

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Don’t die mad, sad, stressed, confused

During our conversation yesterday, she was sounding tired, hassled and exhausted. I quipped, “Why do you sound like you are excessively tired?”
“Yes, I am. Off late it seems I am surrounded with so many things. My sleep time has reduced to a few hours. I feel like I am working in my sleep too.” Replied she.
Me: “Think that you die in a moment from now. Your dead body is lying on the floor and your soul is looking at your body from up above. What would it say?”
After a momentary pause, I continued “Would it feel proud the way you are treating it inside your body?”
She said, “It is a quite new way to think and take stock of life.”
The question that you should ask: When your efforts are not directed at a cause or a purpose, how do you decide what to do day in and day out?
How do you know what to say no to and what to say yes to?
How do you know when you’ve had enough?
Why you’ve gotten on or off the track which keeps you tired, awake, hassled and hungry?

The answer you should find out is that find your meaning, direct your efforts to it, keep that meaning in view. It’s not the activity that
disturbs you, but false conceptions of things that drive you mad. Don’t die mad, sad, stressed, confused.

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